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  1. Pleasing to have your voice and wondering back here again.

    Am I permitted to stand on my head about gratitude? I like it more when it leads my path, more than when a puppy dogs tail, an afterthought. Is that stance generosity? I made that deal with life once upon a time. Somedays I live up to that vow. Whatever comes my way, at least it came my way at all you know. The experience is different, heads or tails.

    AND about the time you went away, your lovely “book” arrived. Patience, more than right! Worth the wait. Your book in a single word – exquisite. No fooling Ren! I feel honored having a copy, I do. neil

    • I am so glad the book got there! It is comforting to find you here as I return to the space again. Find you writing a bit too 😉

  2. I love the “idea” of hope which is, in itself, hopeful. Yet it doesn’t sustain us. I enjoy reading your raw, honest views. Thank you. Pamela

  3. We don’t hold our breaths. Why then cling with emotions and thoughts? Yes. Ren your self expression/examination is, I think, beautiful in and of itself. Thanks for showing and sharing.

  4. Thanks Ren. We seldom expect the unexpected. Too obvious? Been kinda looking at the same, if with different words. Kindness, compassion, gratitude? And even when I see the right (more alive, genuine) way to be, well… is it exhaustion or laziness leading me astray?

  5. In sum, ouch, is the word. Still, to my ears your process of expression reads like love. You teach me.

    And did I say?, thank you for your exquisite handmade book. A real work of art in every way. Thanks Ren. And FYI, the like-button here don’t work for me, but never think I’m not reading. I am.

    • So wonderful to hear from you – my wheels have been spinning a bit too fast lately but I know I will settle soon. It means a lot to know you are reading – and writing, too! Again, so happy to know that you like the book!

  6. Can’t begin to say how much I love this contemplation, Ren. I think of my own compulsive returns to memory (as if memories were a place–and sometimes, I guess they are), but they remain nether-neverlands at that. And they are knotted with nightmares, daytime anxiety spikes, the running script in the brain and in the blood that doesn’t stop, unless you touch something outside of your body, pay attention to something that is not you, to get outside. But then we have moments, too, where we should just experience it, on its own sublingual terms.

  7. Beautiful, listening. Odd thing to say? Asking myself. But yes, beautiful. Been thinking better to exclude more of my dire thoughts about having a body – but exclusion… that’s a lie. You make more visible. Thankful for the lessons your living teaches. Now – morning coffee and a bench on the street.

  8. I so enjoy reading your thoughts. Always refreshing & grounding. You capture what it is to simply be human so well, and it’s beautiful. Whenever my mind runs rampant, I remember your voice from a class at Vågen softly saying «humans love stories». It often calms me & I’m grateful to have that as a kind of core memory.

    I miss the rain. The smell of Norwegian air after the heavy downpour stops. Sending you some internal sunshine from California.

  9. If one word to describe your writing here – scenic. So much swimming movement in your chosen words. You make me love the water! Thanks for letting me see.

  10. Even eyes-open I wonder how much/little we really yet understand. But no choice huh, to begin where we begin. The krill, good analogy!

  11. No pun intended, Ren, but I feel you. Both in regards to FB and also in regards to humans’ limited capacity for maintaining relationships, both of which I’ve written about.


  12. Thank you for your empathy and your wisdom in seeing & saying that in-person empathy seems better than internet empathy here. You enlightened and comforted me, as I’ve witnessed FB friends in their struggles, too, not knowing what to do except express sorrow and wish them well. I do fear that there is no one comforting them in person, alas, but I see that I can still not do more than send support.

  13. I’ve always felt we humans have overrated couples relationship as the very in ability to translate the real intimacy we perceive within our blissful states of conciousness, when I read this I totally got the point, the transcendental anchor as viewers /witness /cocreators of reality, and it’s very liberating…🤩🙏💖I wish I could translate mine as vivid, misterios and enchanting as you do. Most grateful for you sharing you, for being there for L, for the heads up, I will call her
    Love, Merlyn

  14. Listening. I like your voice. I like how you swim. I can’t fix the universe, much less myself. But I can smile with a passing stranger. Can that be enough? Me, I’ll root for that.

  15. I read this several times. Quiet my own thoughts, listen better. Beautiful. How it moves. How it sees itself. Palm to palm. Your writing is meditation itself. Thanks. 🙂

  16. Gorgeous post. Resonates down to my toes. My hands relax as I read this over the second time. Thank you.

  17. Your last couple of paragraphs about writing…..ah, yes! Thank you for putting words around my thoughts.

    I was recently asked what I would do when I retired, and one of the things I said was “write”. Which of course prompted the questions — write what? and why? I thought that my why was simply that I want to, but I see it’s more than that. Not write for others, but write to not “let myself slip through my own fingers”.

    Your writing is such a blessing to me. Thank you!

  18. I wish I lived near you…I’d love to run along side and talk about life and all the beautiful things we see

  19. Loved reading this. So glad you’re allowing yourself some grace. Perfect.
    And your self-care. Fabulous.
    Stay away from labeling, my friend. You’ll be ok. Promise. I wish you miracles. xo

  20. I think you do alright swimming upstream. And writing a new play sounds plain right to me, without any worry why. I’m mid labor letting go some needed pain meds, eager to be done, and writing? Well THAT seems a far reality right now. But reading you, gets me some brighter now. Gentle optimism is not really future-sense, but of merit in this moment now. Or maybe I’m just fishing?

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