March 6th, 2019

Dear DLD,

Yeah, so I’m going to do it: “I had this weird dream”.

A stressful dream anchored in S.’s story at the dinner party last night – about the electric scooter with the warning label that it was not recommended for people over 50. I bought one. And I was trying to get from one side of town to another, through a crush of people – could have been London. I stopped to watch a performance at one point and was concerned that someone would steal the scooter. I was torn between trying to watch the performance and watch the scooter. I woke as I was trying to navigate through a crowd of teenagers that I could have easily walked among.

An hour later , sitting here with coffee and pen & paper, I’m laughing out loud. Don’t we do that? Take something that is a fun toy, and try to shoehorn it into usefulness to justify it? Not even notice that doing so creates more distractions and obstacles from the constructed “purpose”?

I am reframing the “not recommended for people over 50” entirely. And I am thinking of you and your daily prayer for God to make you useful. And I am thinking now I should perhaps be writing to Oscar Wilde instead.

Maybe “make me joyful” is a more honest prayer?